beware...

I haven't blogged in awhile and the past couple days have completely stressed me out:

1. I can't imagine spending Christmas morning without the kids. Justin and I had a long chat the other night and I know he doesn't want to miss the kids faces either. I hate this for both of us. Even though we were separated, we still made it work last year and we did Christmas together. Now... that I have a house and we both have other people in our lives... it is so hard! I don't know what the answer is... Yep... I cried for hours over this...

2. I was let go of my job... that I love and have only been at for 6 months... due to downsizing. They did give me 6 weeks notice, but I haven't found anything yet. I've been applying and applying. I'm STRESSING out! I only have until December 31st here... then what... I'm a single mom with a mortgage, bills, and car payment! Yep... I cried over this too...

3. I'm working a crazy amount of jobs right now. Well... not so many jobs, but crazy hours. I've done so many photo shoots this fall that I had to take a break. Yes, I turned a few away because I want to keep it fun and not dread having to edit them. I also been doing security at Park 100. On Saturday I worked from 6:45 until 4:30 then thru the week I've been working from 4:30 until 10:30-12:30 (only on nights I don't have the kids). It is the most boring job ever! I've also been working security at some LHS bball game which is okay. This doesn't include the hours I'm trying to put in at the PD! Ugh...

4. I'm missing the kids first bball games due to work. Yep... I've cried... I hate this!!

Haley told me the other day while editing pictures... you know mom, we are only young once! Yep... I cried and shut my computer down instantly!!

I'm not sure why the last few days have just got to me... It is ridiculous!

On a funny note... Leo... our Elf on the Shelf arrived! First, he was in my coffee mug when the kids found him! They were estatic! He had wrapped himself around glittery sticks in a vase and tangled himself in my mini blinds. The kids LOVE this! However, I'm not sure who is loving it more... I have a million places I want to stick Leo. For tomorrow when I get the kids back, he his hanging upside down from an old window above my TV! I can't wait for them to see Leo. Tom has just as much fun thinking of places!

I can't believe it is December 1st. 2011 has flown by. 2010 & 2011 were rough for me... I'm REALLY hoping for a brand new, fun, fantastic start to 2012!! Which means I need to find a job ASAP!

I love my kids!!