beware...

I haven't blogged in awhile and the past couple days have completely stressed me out:

1. I can't imagine spending Christmas morning without the kids. Justin and I had a long chat the other night and I know he doesn't want to miss the kids faces either. I hate this for both of us. Even though we were separated, we still made it work last year and we did Christmas together. Now... that I have a house and we both have other people in our lives... it is so hard! I don't know what the answer is... Yep... I cried for hours over this...

2. I was let go of my job... that I love and have only been at for 6 months... due to downsizing. They did give me 6 weeks notice, but I haven't found anything yet. I've been applying and applying. I'm STRESSING out! I only have until December 31st here... then what... I'm a single mom with a mortgage, bills, and car payment! Yep... I cried over this too...

3. I'm working a crazy amount of jobs right now. Well... not so many jobs, but crazy hours. I've done so many photo shoots this fall that I had to take a break. Yes, I turned a few away because I want to keep it fun and not dread having to edit them. I also been doing security at Park 100. On Saturday I worked from 6:45 until 4:30 then thru the week I've been working from 4:30 until 10:30-12:30 (only on nights I don't have the kids). It is the most boring job ever! I've also been working security at some LHS bball game which is okay. This doesn't include the hours I'm trying to put in at the PD! Ugh...

4. I'm missing the kids first bball games due to work. Yep... I've cried... I hate this!!

Haley told me the other day while editing pictures... you know mom, we are only young once! Yep... I cried and shut my computer down instantly!!

I'm not sure why the last few days have just got to me... It is ridiculous!

On a funny note... Leo... our Elf on the Shelf arrived! First, he was in my coffee mug when the kids found him! They were estatic! He had wrapped himself around glittery sticks in a vase and tangled himself in my mini blinds. The kids LOVE this! However, I'm not sure who is loving it more... I have a million places I want to stick Leo. For tomorrow when I get the kids back, he his hanging upside down from an old window above my TV! I can't wait for them to see Leo. Tom has just as much fun thinking of places!

I can't believe it is December 1st. 2011 has flown by. 2010 & 2011 were rough for me... I'm REALLY hoping for a brand new, fun, fantastic start to 2012!! Which means I need to find a job ASAP!

I love my kids!!

check out my new blog...
www.jessicamusselmanphotos.blogspot.com

It's not completely set up yet... but at least I've started! :)


Thank you!!

what a party...

for my {30th} birthday! I had NO!! idea.These girls are awesome! We had a great time and they kept a secret!!

I wish my sister could have been there, but it's okay... I know she hated missing it. I know some other girls were busy that night too or lived too far away. We have to work on getting together!
Here's to my next 30 years...

Tom took me to The Melting Pot for dinner before my surprise party! It was SO YUMMY!

As much as I didn't want to turn 30... a few people made some statements that made me realize how blessed I am. I didn't care to hear... age is just a number! I honestly cried on Friday night just thinking about turning 30! But Taylor... thank you! She said something about me having a rough 2 years and she was so proud of where I am in my life right now and that she looked "up" to me. [didn't quote that right!] I owe my family and friends a huge thank you for coming up to the shop and keeping this party a secret. We had a great time and I appreciate everything!

I am so lucky and blessed! I have the best family and friends and 2 AMAZING kids!

Thank you again!!

Pictures...

Ive been taking so many pictures... I've got about 12 or so shoots scheduled for October... WooHoo! Check out my photo blog to see some! I also am doing Cody and Heidi's wedding in February. That is pretty exciting!!

Anyway, Heidi snapped a few shots of Tom and me one evening, then I took a few of Haley. Drew was NOT feeling well... I think he may of had food poisoning! Dang Little Ceasar's Hot and Ready. Honestly, I don't know because Haley and I didn't get sick... or he may have faked so I didn't take his picture.

Thank goodness for wireless internet!! I'm sitting in a training right now and this is my 5th one in 4 days!

Tomorrow is the day... BOOO!!

I love my kids!

It's mine...

I own a home again! I am so excited {and completely terrified} at the same time!! Most boxes are unpacked, but I still have a few that are loaded with "stuff." It's all the stuff that I MUST keep but have no idea what to do with. I will post pictures as soon as we have it looking home-y with personal pictures and decor. The kids rooms are finished and tonight will be the first night they see them!! I owe a huge thank you to 3 friends for coming over to paint Saturday night and then my siblings, Heidi, Mom, Matt, and Adam for helping me move. Tom has been great putting things together... especially Haley's bed that too 5 1/2 hours. YIKES... it had 32 pages of instructions. I'm so excited for the kiddos to see their spaces!!

Eric and Ali are engaged!! He asked her about a week ago, but I wasn't allowed to say until her family in OK found out! I'm so excited to be gaining 2 sis-in-laws!! WooHoo!! Cody and Heidi set a date: 2.19.12 (Their favorite verse from Hosea 2:19) Eric and Ali have not yet, but hopefully soon!!

Boo... on job searching again! Long story which I can't talk about yet, but I just can't chance anything being a single mom with a mortgage!!

I really don't have anything else to chat about now... sorry Heidi!!

I love my kids!!

Photos...

Tom & I setting up for Cody & Heidi's engagement!
First Day of Kindergarten

Right after she said "YES"

Loving Patoka Lake

My whole world

The girls

Drew fished the whole trip

Pirate Night

A lot of cards were played

I LOVE my siblings

Pretty much sums up our week

First Day of 2nd Grade

Water babies!

Haley & Kenzie loved tubing

Whole group on Pirate Night... thank you DAD!!

Love Her

Toga Night

Need to think...

of new blog titles. Crazy gets a little boring! But that is how my life is... CRAZY!
The kids started school this week. Today is day 4... only 176 more to go until summer vacation 2012! Haley looped from last year, so she has Mrs. Lockwood again {whom we love!} and the same classmates. She seems to love it so far! Day 1: She HATED the YMCA afterschool program. I've always picked them up, but with a full time job and time changes... it was impossible. Day 3: Best thing ever she says!! Drew started kindergarten and I didn't realize it would hit me so hard. Holy cow I was a MESS {understatemen}t on Sunday. He was so excited Monday morning. Day 4: cried when I dropped him off. I had to text Stacy to check on him because I felt like the worst mom ever sending him in. [He was fine!]

Cody & Heidi are engaged!! So happy for them!! No date has been set yet, but I'll keep you posted.

2 weeks from Friday... I close on my new house! 2 weeks from Sunday... We move in! I'm hoping and praying everything goes the way it is supposed too.

Tom and I are great! Having fun... we laugh a lot! The kids really get along great with him. haha... I'm pretty sure we started dating right after my last post, so he is good enough to meet my kids and I guess I will except the fact that I'm a "puma!"

Work is getting insane. Fingers crossed about a few things, but that will come out later.

Vacation [houseboat] was amazing!! We all had the best time. I need to have a blog of photo updates... maybe next time! I can't thank my dad for our great trip! Next vacation: spring break @ Orange Lake Resort in Orlando.

I guess that is it for now... I love my kids!!