It's July...

and I'm not sure I blogged once in June! Where is the summer going?

Last year at this time:
I stayed at home with the kids
We went to the pool almost everyday
I had the best tan of my life
I was married
I could help dad on the farm whenever I wanted
I had lost myself
I didn't know how to stand up for my beliefs
I wasn't being the best mom I could
I was dependant on Justin

Today:
I miss being with my kids all the time
I am a little "whiter" than I wish I was
I am now officially divorced
I don't get out to the farm to work as much
I have a "big girl" job
I can support myself and the kids
I am a much better mom because I actually get some free time
I just bought a house {hopefully}
I know exactly who I am & what I want

When I turned 29... I had no idea what the next year had in store for me. All I knew was that the road to the "DIRTY 30" was not one I was ready to take. I had set high goals for myself {even before Justin and I separated} and I was going to do everything in my power to exceed them. WOW... If I had only known... I'm so happy with life. I'm finally doing things for the kids and me. That is what I've learned... I can make it on my own. I know some of you are thinking that "you live with your mom" and yes I do, but 6 months isn't too long for me to get on my feet. You have to understand that I've been a stay at home mom for 5 years and I was starting from the ground up! Trust me... I hated moving into my mom's house, but I am SO incredibly thankful for everything she {and my entire family} has done for us.

SO... this road... this path... this journey... that I do not want to be on... is getting closer. I hate the thought of checking the next box. No longer {well I can for 2 more months} can I mark 20-29... AWWW! 30 is just a number and I hate it! I'm so happy with life right now; it's just that facct that my 20s will soon be gone. But... I have 5 jobs that I LOVE: Chaucie's Place, Lapel Police Dept., taking pictures, working on the farm, & BY FAR THE BEST: being a momma to the most amazing kids ever!

The HOUSE: is small, but on a huge lot. I'm an outside person and couldn't be happier. I have big plans for the yard. Back up a few months: one day while on duty I saw a house for sale by owner. I called and looked at it with my dad. He liked it. I didn't do anything about it. Got in an agruement with my momma and decided it was time to move out... haha... love you!! Anyway, looked at it again, agreed on a price verbally, and thanks to my [ex] mother-in-law that I still love, the process got started. I appreciate all her help with my 1000 questions. Fast forward to this past Wednesday... the inspection did not go great. 2 main beams, 18 floor joist, 80 ft of sill(?) all have to be replace. He also found fungus and beetles in the crawl space. I was crushed and decided it was a deal breaker. A few tears and phone calls... I was walking away. THEN: got an estimate yesterday and it wasn't all that bad. I'm waiting on a phone call now from the seller to see if she is going to pay for it all. IF she will, then I'll still buy the house... IF not, then I'm done. Hurry up and call me Please!! To be continued...

Dating: I'm so not good at! I haven't dated in over 9 years. I'm a protective momma and no one is good enough to meet my kids. My standards are super high. I'm been called a cougar... which isn't true... I was informed I'm a puma... which isn't true either. I like hanging out with my friends and family too much! Blind dates... oh Heidi! I love doing things for myself and whenever I want!!

I talk about my {GIRLS} a lot! One of them is really sick with cancer! I love her and my kids adore her. Please keep Shana in your prayers! Chemo starts on Tuesday after being moved up a few weeks. I don't think it is my business to go into detail, but PLEASE PRAY!! Thank you!!

It almost my FAVORITE DAY of the SUMMER: cattle show day!! Hamilton County Jr. Nationals... just kidding but I'm so excited.

July 25th has always been so far away too and now it is right around the corner. That's right... our {WHOLE} family vacation that dad's been planning forever. We are going to Patoka and have 2 house boats. Theme nights are planned: Mardi Gras, Pirate, Hawaiian, & Toga... can't wait for these pictures. haha... should be lots of fun!!

I should probably get back to work!! Happy FRIDAY!

I love my kids!