Honesty

So here is my confession today:

I haven't worked in nearly 2 weeks! Why do I have a pile of laundry this big? Truth is... they are all clean clothes that have been laying there for 4-5 days! Now, that I've starting sorting into piles (Haley, Drew, Tom, Me, Towels, Kitchen, Sheets)... I have to add a pile titled "MUST IRON!"

My next confession:

I will probably throw them all into the dryer again and pray the wrinkles come out!!

Nothing like 4 months...

I promised to get better about blogging... and I haven't! So sorry!! The past few months have flown by! How can it be April 2012 already!?!

1st: Happy birthday to my favorite guy in this entire world!

2nd: Tom and I have been dating 9 months today!

3rd: I'm starting a new chapter on April 16th!

4th: Update on my Life as a Mom

Here goes:

1. How can I have a 6 and 8 year old? It seems like yesterday that I was telling Justin we were going to have a baby. I have so many vivid memories about being pregnant, delivering, and about the kids growing up. {yes, I know they are still growing!} I remember the crazy things... normal people don't think about! I remember things that were said... haha and yes I just laughed out loud. Anyway, both kids had friends over to our house this year. It was fun! Today, I ate lunch at school for the first time EVER with both kids. Does that make me a bad mom... I've never eaten at school with them! Oh well... hopefully there will be lots more of that in the future.

2. From not wanting to date... to meeting Tom... to being engaged... and then calling it off! I love him and the past 9 months have been awesome for the most part. I have never been sure about getting married again, and I thought I was ready... however... I completely lost it over the 3 weeks or so that Tom and I were engaged. How can a ring can so much between 2 people? We were so happy and then everything started going down hill. It was awful!! I panicked and gave the ring back. Things couldn't be better once again. I upset many people, but one thing I've learned is that I can't please everyone. I need to be happy for the kids, for me, and for our little family! AND that's what we are... HAPPY! I'm so proud of him too: following his dream of being a MEDIC! This year will be a long one, but it will be worth it seeing him graduate in March 2013!

3. Spring break was amazing! More about that in a minute... my new chapter! I was fired after being on vacation for 9 days. My boss decided she would fire a single mom for needing stability and security in her life... blah, blah, blah! I was offered a new job while on Spring Break! I will begin working at Hamilton County Community Corrections next Monday. I'll be on days for 3 weeks while training, but then I'm switching to 12 hour shifts on nights. It is the same schedule that Justin and I use with the kids, so I'll work when they are with him. I so excited and nervous! Better pay, benefits, closer to home, no daycare for Haley and Drew... LOTS of PROS!

4. My house is coming together and it is cute and homey! I love it! My neighbors rock, love being across the road from a park, perfect for running and playing... Tom dug me a new flower bed around the front patio... too bad it is 40 degrees today! I would love to have some flowers now!! I would love to knock out a wall too. My honey-do list keeps growing and growing!! The kids love Tom and we are a happy family! Drew is playing baseball! Haley is in mini 4-H! She can't wait to start dance again! He will play every sport possible! I love those two kids more than words can describe!

What else...

My brother got MARRIED and I gained an amazing sister in law and niece! Check out my photo blog (jessicamusselmanphotos.blogspot.com) and you will see some pictures. I couldn't be happier for them! Also... Cody passed his fire test!! Yes, he will be a fireman!!

Eric got baptized the Saturday night before Easter! What an awesome commitment!! Congrats bub!!

Easter was fun! Our church service was great and made me think about many things! I'll never get used to sharing the kids on holidays but we are making it work. Cherie and Dad always spoil the grandkids... AND KIDS! Yummy chicken and noodles too... my favorite!!

Orange Lake Resort... just outside of Orlando! AWESOME!! My mom got a deal on a time share and we all went. Tim & Susan (Adam's parents), Adam, Ashley, & Ty, Tom, the kids, & me... FUN TIMES! Drew golfed his first "real" course and also got to pick out birthday presents from the Lego store in Downtown Disney/ Pleasure Island.

**I love to run**I love to run**I love to run** - I'm going to keep telling myself that even though I don't love it yet... I'm trying!

I guess that is an update for now. I'm going to try to blog more... and be more interesting! What should I blog about... Mmmm...

I love my kids!

beware...

I haven't blogged in awhile and the past couple days have completely stressed me out:

1. I can't imagine spending Christmas morning without the kids. Justin and I had a long chat the other night and I know he doesn't want to miss the kids faces either. I hate this for both of us. Even though we were separated, we still made it work last year and we did Christmas together. Now... that I have a house and we both have other people in our lives... it is so hard! I don't know what the answer is... Yep... I cried for hours over this...

2. I was let go of my job... that I love and have only been at for 6 months... due to downsizing. They did give me 6 weeks notice, but I haven't found anything yet. I've been applying and applying. I'm STRESSING out! I only have until December 31st here... then what... I'm a single mom with a mortgage, bills, and car payment! Yep... I cried over this too...

3. I'm working a crazy amount of jobs right now. Well... not so many jobs, but crazy hours. I've done so many photo shoots this fall that I had to take a break. Yes, I turned a few away because I want to keep it fun and not dread having to edit them. I also been doing security at Park 100. On Saturday I worked from 6:45 until 4:30 then thru the week I've been working from 4:30 until 10:30-12:30 (only on nights I don't have the kids). It is the most boring job ever! I've also been working security at some LHS bball game which is okay. This doesn't include the hours I'm trying to put in at the PD! Ugh...

4. I'm missing the kids first bball games due to work. Yep... I've cried... I hate this!!

Haley told me the other day while editing pictures... you know mom, we are only young once! Yep... I cried and shut my computer down instantly!!

I'm not sure why the last few days have just got to me... It is ridiculous!

On a funny note... Leo... our Elf on the Shelf arrived! First, he was in my coffee mug when the kids found him! They were estatic! He had wrapped himself around glittery sticks in a vase and tangled himself in my mini blinds. The kids LOVE this! However, I'm not sure who is loving it more... I have a million places I want to stick Leo. For tomorrow when I get the kids back, he his hanging upside down from an old window above my TV! I can't wait for them to see Leo. Tom has just as much fun thinking of places!

I can't believe it is December 1st. 2011 has flown by. 2010 & 2011 were rough for me... I'm REALLY hoping for a brand new, fun, fantastic start to 2012!! Which means I need to find a job ASAP!

I love my kids!!

check out my new blog...
www.jessicamusselmanphotos.blogspot.com

It's not completely set up yet... but at least I've started! :)


Thank you!!

what a party...

for my {30th} birthday! I had NO!! idea.These girls are awesome! We had a great time and they kept a secret!!

I wish my sister could have been there, but it's okay... I know she hated missing it. I know some other girls were busy that night too or lived too far away. We have to work on getting together!
Here's to my next 30 years...

Tom took me to The Melting Pot for dinner before my surprise party! It was SO YUMMY!

As much as I didn't want to turn 30... a few people made some statements that made me realize how blessed I am. I didn't care to hear... age is just a number! I honestly cried on Friday night just thinking about turning 30! But Taylor... thank you! She said something about me having a rough 2 years and she was so proud of where I am in my life right now and that she looked "up" to me. [didn't quote that right!] I owe my family and friends a huge thank you for coming up to the shop and keeping this party a secret. We had a great time and I appreciate everything!

I am so lucky and blessed! I have the best family and friends and 2 AMAZING kids!

Thank you again!!

Pictures...

Ive been taking so many pictures... I've got about 12 or so shoots scheduled for October... WooHoo! Check out my photo blog to see some! I also am doing Cody and Heidi's wedding in February. That is pretty exciting!!

Anyway, Heidi snapped a few shots of Tom and me one evening, then I took a few of Haley. Drew was NOT feeling well... I think he may of had food poisoning! Dang Little Ceasar's Hot and Ready. Honestly, I don't know because Haley and I didn't get sick... or he may have faked so I didn't take his picture.

Thank goodness for wireless internet!! I'm sitting in a training right now and this is my 5th one in 4 days!

Tomorrow is the day... BOOO!!

I love my kids!

It's mine...

I own a home again! I am so excited {and completely terrified} at the same time!! Most boxes are unpacked, but I still have a few that are loaded with "stuff." It's all the stuff that I MUST keep but have no idea what to do with. I will post pictures as soon as we have it looking home-y with personal pictures and decor. The kids rooms are finished and tonight will be the first night they see them!! I owe a huge thank you to 3 friends for coming over to paint Saturday night and then my siblings, Heidi, Mom, Matt, and Adam for helping me move. Tom has been great putting things together... especially Haley's bed that too 5 1/2 hours. YIKES... it had 32 pages of instructions. I'm so excited for the kiddos to see their spaces!!

Eric and Ali are engaged!! He asked her about a week ago, but I wasn't allowed to say until her family in OK found out! I'm so excited to be gaining 2 sis-in-laws!! WooHoo!! Cody and Heidi set a date: 2.19.12 (Their favorite verse from Hosea 2:19) Eric and Ali have not yet, but hopefully soon!!

Boo... on job searching again! Long story which I can't talk about yet, but I just can't chance anything being a single mom with a mortgage!!

I really don't have anything else to chat about now... sorry Heidi!!

I love my kids!!